When I first started this blog, I had no real concept of metaphysics, 3D, 4D or 5D states of consciousness. I was on a journey of personal development, moving through this physical world, sharing my insights with all of you along the way (which I still am and will continue to do!). 

A lot has changed in the past 7 years; as I continued to accumulate knowledge and life experience, I grew spiritually. I’ve realized that although many of the concepts I shared with you are still valid and do have their place in this physical “3D” reality, there are other metaphysical truths that must be understood in order to achieve holistic success. 

The thing is, while you may be able to achieve tangible goals (3D success) by taking action alone, metaphysical success requires more than just physical action -you must first have the right frequency (mental attitude) in order to manifest your desired reality.

Your Energetic Signature

We each have a unique energetic signature, or frequency, which is comprised of our thoughts, beliefs, attention, emotional conviction, and identity. And whether you’re aware of it or not, your frequency is the cause of your reality. 

It’s like ordering something off Amazon – there are a multitude of products, and each product has a unique product code (UPC).

Likewise, the universe has a multitude of realities--your frequency is the UPC for your reality. The frequency you are emitting is placing an order with the universe for a particular reality.

Once you are aware that it is your frequency that determines your reality, you can then attune your frequency to your desired reality in order to attain it. So, what reality are you ordering… and which one do you want to order?

Order What You Want (Not What You Don’t Want)

Because the universe will seek to match whatever frequency you’re putting out there, you can make your frequency – or mental attitude-- work to your advantage (of course, the opposite is true as well). 

Attention is the beginning of creation – where attention goes, energy flows. Before anything manifests physically, it first exists mentally/vibrationally. The more energy that flows to something, the more you are indicating to the universe that that’s what you want. 

Likewise, each time you are presented with an opportunity to react or respond, you are being given a menu with two items – what you want and what you don’t want. Point to what you want.

Think about it like ordering off a menu with pictures but the waiter doesn’t speak English. If you point to the fish and say, “I want the steak”, or you point to the fish and say, “I don’t want this”, he will nevertheless assume that what you pointed to is what you wanted.   

Co-Create the Reality That You Want (Not One That You Fear)

If you give attention to the things you don’t want, you are only strengthening those potentialities with your fear. Your fear is like a beacon of light for that which you fear – it will draw it to you, simply because you have given it so much energy, so many emotionally-charged thoughts.

By fearing something, you are confessing that it is stronger than you – and since the strongest frequency wins, the thing you fear will control you or come upon you. 

Keep in mind the infamous Double Slit quantum mechanics experiment, which showed that particles can exist in multiple places at once until observed -- simply interacting with them by taking a measurement changes their behavior.

On a metaphysical level, this means that you co-create your reality. There are a multitude of potentialities for your reality and the one that becomes “real” for you is the one that you observe, interact with, and measure (pass judgment upon, form a belief about). We each live in our own YOUniverse.

So, what are you observing and how are you measuring those things? Are you tuning your awareness to things that are in alignment with your desired reality?  What things are you investing in by giving them your attention?

Be Good With it and Good Without It

In order for your desired reality to manifest, you must be good with it and good without it. 

Because you can’t have what you need -- you must already have it vibrationally (be vibrationally aligned with it) before you can have it physically. 

Needing indicates that you don’t have it vibrationally. Desperation will only push it farther away because it is indicating to the universe that you are lacking something internally – therefore, you will lack it externally as well. 

“Needing” places excess importance on something and therefore creates space between you and the thing that you “need”.

So, in order to collapse that space that separates you from your desired reality, you must de-pedestalize your desire…see it as normal, take it for granted.

Be good with it and good without it. You must get to a place where you are no longer emotionally dependent upon seeing reality change. 

Your Destination is Actually Your Starting Location

I, like most people, were taught that if I work hard, then I will achieve my desired reality, which will allow me to feel a certain way. 

For example, if I work really hard, then I will make X amount of money and then I will feel successful/abundant. (Action Desired Reality Feeling/Mental Attitude)

But, in reality, the formula for metaphysical success is:

Feeling/Mental Attitude Action Desired Reality. 

If you’re only focused on taking action to achieve your goals, you are working out of order. You must first be in vibrational alignment with your desired reality.

Think from the position of already having your desired reality – how would you think and move?  Then, when you take action, it will lead to your desired reality. 

Focus On Your Frequency First

So, frequency must precede action. Being is more powerful than doing.  

You will not attain metaphysical success/ your desired reality by merely taking action alone. You must first have the right mental attitude, and then the right action will flow from that, which is what creates your reality (materialized frequency).

Because your frequency informs your intuition, which influences your decisions – it compels you to take actions in alignment with that frequency. 

Frequency Compels you to act Which then manifests your reality

Ironically, once you are in the right frequency, you will no longer be emotionally dependent upon seeing your desired reality manifest in the 3D because you already have it energetically.

Be grateful and enthusiastic ahead of time – before the world proves it to you, before you see it physically manifest in the 3D. Thinking and behaving like you would if you already had your desired reality and feeling gratitude and enthusiasm will put you in the right frequency to draw that desired reality to you.

You must have it vibrationally before you can have it physically.

Vibration is determined by focus/concentration. So, where is your focus? What are you concentrating on? Not all thoughts are equal – which of your thoughts are emotionally charged? Those will have the most influence on your subconscious, and hence, your frequency.    

Your Desired Reality Doesn’t Have to Be Realistic or Logical

What we humans see with eyesight in this 3D reality is only .0035% of the electromagnetic spectrum.  

And we don’t even “see” with our eyes - our eyes take in electric signals and send them to the brain; the brain then produces an image of what it thinks it’s seeing based on assumptions and predictions. That’s why magic tricks can work on you.

So, who’s to say what’s realistic or delusional? Considering that 99.9965% of reality is unseen, don’t allow your potential to be defined by the .0035%.  

In this limited observable reality (3D) also exists limiting concepts such as polarity – good and bad, light and dark, up and down, rich and poor, hot and cold. 

On an energetic level, each of those duos are the same energy vibrating at different rates of vibration. The same way ice and steam are the same substance materialized in different forms, matter and consciousness are the same substance materialized in different forms – the same energy vibrating at different rates of vibration.

Outside of this 3rd dimensional realm, there is no polarity—only oneness. God, the infinite intelligence, is above illusion.

You may not be able to achieve your desired reality on your own, but with God, all things are possible. You are an expression of God, or the infinite intelligence – which is omnipotent and omniscient – there is nothing that God cannot do. We are confined to this 3D reality, but God is not, and neither is the aspect of God (highest level of consciousness) that is within you.  

Are Your Beliefs Serving You or Controlling You?

The only things you are limited by are your own self-limiting beliefs. 

The beliefs that you hold form the blueprint of your reality. Because before anything exists physically, it first exists in the mind. The world you live in is nothing more than your beliefs materialized, a world of frozen imagination.

The first step is to recognize your self-limiting beliefs. In doing so, it is important to understand that there are no truths other than what the subconscious mind has accepted as true.

Your beliefs are simply repeated thoughts with an emotional charge that become your reality – and if they are not serving you (by helping you achieve your desired reality), then they are controlling you. 

For example, let’s say you want to quit smoking. Does it serve you to believe that it will be difficult to quit? If you want to be financially free, does it serve you to believe that you have to work hard to make money? If you want to be in a healthy relationship, does it serve you to believe that all men are cheaters? These are just some examples; think about what beliefs you hold and how they may be influencing your reality. 

Choose to Hold Beliefs that Align with Your Desired Reality

Your subconscious mind that holds these beliefs will trick you into believing that you are right by giving you an artificial ego boost. It will present you with people, circumstances, and events that make you say, “See! I knew it, I was right.”

But, in reality, you drew those people, circumstances, and events to you with your frequency.

You can just as well hold the opposite belief, one that actually serves you and leads to your desired reality. You don’t have to stay trapped in the box of your limiting belief; you can think outside the box.

So, examine your beliefs and ask yourself if they are aligned or misaligned with your desired reality. Only the ones aligned with your desired reality should remain.

Other than your beliefs, is there anything else in your life that reflects, resonates with, or implies the things you do not want? (ex: scarcity). Getting rid of those things will also help you to align with the frequency of your desired reality. (ex: abundance). 

Outsmart The Old You & Remain Steadfast in Your Desired Reality

You have a collection of thoughts + emotion, otherwise known as thought forms. When those thought forms are repeated over time, they give birth to a spiritual entity (aka the old version of you). 

That entity is blind intelligence. It just wants to live, and it will do anything - including sabotage you - to continue existing. It is dependent upon keeping you in the same paradigm, so whenever you try to step outside of that, it will try to drag you back in by getting you to feel frustration and disappointment.

And it will do so by presenting you with circumstances, people, and events that it knows usually gets you to react. If you do react predictably, those negative emotions create a certain frequency which acts like glue to your old frequency, the old version of you.  

Don’t let those circumstances destroy your progress ---remember, it’s just your old frequency trying press your buttons and get you to react so it can continue to live. Don’t fall for it – be nonreactive. This requires a certain degree of emotional discipline and resilience. Have conviction in your desired reality; be the stronger frequency.

The closer you get to your desired reality, the more your old frequency will try to project its fear onto you, so you get scared and don’t continue moving forward.

You can end this cycle of self-sabotage by seeing yourself as separate from your old frequency – it’s not your fear; it’s the old frequency’s. You’re not scared; the old version of you is. 

Your Self-Worth Is the Energetic Ceiling of Anything You’ll Be Able to Materialize

“We don’t rise to the level of our aspirations; we fall to the level of our self-worth.”

What do you know you deserve? What your subconscious thinks you deserve is what you have already emotionally experienced. Any emotionally-charged experiences you went through will influence the subconscious – good or bad.

For example, if you grew up poor and you had an emotional charge attached to that experience, your subconscious will believe that you deserve to be poor. If you were loved and cherished, your subconscious will believe that you deserve to be loved and cherished. 

As you can see, this can either work for you or against you when it comes to manifesting your desired reality. Fortunately, you can create the emotionally charged experiences that serve you.

Because your brain cannot distinguish between what is imagined and what is experienced, you can imagine emotionally charged experiences that increase your self-worth, thereby raising the ceiling on what you can manifest.  

By contrast, the 3D definition of self-worth is externalized—it’s determined by the perception of others and your achievements and failures.

This is folly; others wear their own “lenses”. Each person’s lenses are unique; they’re colored by their own experiences that tint and distort reality --they cannot objectively perceive you beyond that filter (this concept is also known as the perception-projection loop).

So, they simply can’t be the ones to tell you what you’re capable of. Only you can do that. And achievements and failures are concepts rooted in polarity, which is an illusion of the 3D reality. 

If you grant anything external (receiving validation, love, respect, accolades, money, appearance, etc.) control over your self-worth, then you allow those things to define the limits of your reality and metaphysical success.

Build Self-Trust to Boost Your Confidence

Instead, internalize your self-worth. Cultivate the experiences that make you feel worthy by simply imagining them.

For example, imagine someone who you know would be happy for your success congratulating you on whatever it is you want to manifest while feeling the validation, love, accolades, etc. The more you give that emotional experience to yourself, the more you will be signaling to your subconscious that you deserve it, and moreover, that you already have it. 

Another aspect of self-worth is confidence --- the root word of which is “fid”, meaning trust in Latin. You must build up your self-trust to increase your confidence. This means doing things you know you should do and not doing things you know you shouldn’t do.

You may think that those things don’t affect you especially when they are small, but the truth is your subconscious remembers everything and keeps the score. As you continue to prove to yourself that you are a person of your word, you will be more confident in your abilities and more convicted in the actions you take. 

Be Intentional About What You Give Attention To

Be on the lookout for synchronicities and notice how you played a part in them manifesting. Notice the connections between your inner world and outer circumstances.

By being intentional in this way, you are training the reticular activating system (RAS) in your brain. The RAS acts as a selective filter, filtering out what it deems irrelevant and drawing your attention to what it deems relevant. 

Since your brain simply cannot process all incoming information, it has developed certain shortcuts (also known as heuristics/cognitive biases). One of those mental shortcuts is the RAS.

 Have you ever noticed that once you learn something new or focus on something new you start seeing it everywhere? That’s your RAS at work. Another example is your ability to snap to attention upon hearing your name, even in a noisy environment. 

You can program this system to notice things related to your desired reality and filter out things that do not. Once you do, you’ll be tuned to the right frequency. Information and opportunities that you previously would not have noticed will be popping up all over the place. Noticing and taking advantage of those opportunities will help you attain your desired reality. 

Give Yourself Grace

Finally, give yourself some grace. You’ve been operating as the “old version of you” way longer than you’ve been operating from your new frequency. 

There may be moments when you have emotional reactions to things that the 3D reality shows you. You may have times when you lose sight of your true nature (an expression of God) and get wrapped up in unimportant or detrimental things. 

It’s ok. You have only fallen because you have risen. 

This is a dynamic personal growth journey that will continue for the rest of your life. It’s not important (or even possible) to be successful/high vibe all the time; things will naturally ebb and flow.

What’s important is to be resilient. Know that all paths (even the difficult ones) lead to one destination: your desired reality. 

I'd like to give credit to Nero on YouTube (thank you!), who helped me understand these concepts.

Advertisements are constantly telling us who we are, or who we should be. 

Commercials tell us we need more stuff, social media tells us we should look a certain way, and society generally accepts these propositions without question.

But let’s stop and ask ourselves – why?

Why do we as women need to wear makeup? Do we need to shave? Why do we need to dye our gray hair? Do we really need to get injections, have plastic surgery, lose weight?

The truth is, only the makers and marketers of those products have something to gain (money). We simply lose our time, money, and self-esteem.

Who are you really? At your core? 

You are not a walking billboard for someone else’s products. We don't have to be some replicated result of an imposed standard of beauty. 

You are love and you are light. You're a special star that shines all on your own without the need for any bells and whistles. 

If it makes you feel good to wear makeup or fix your hair a certain way, then by all means do it. Just make sure that you are doing it for yourself, not just mindlessly following the “rules” imposed on your gender, age, etc. You are free to live by your own definition of success.

Everybody is beautiful. Everybody. And this world needs your uniqueness. You have a flavor and flair that is different from anyone else’s. Embrace that magic ingredient that makes you, you and share it proudly.

I stopped shaving and dying my hair back in 2020 and it is still perceived as almost an act of rebellion. People have reactions of shock, disgust, and even anger.

But it’s not their fault that they initially feel this way. They have been conditioned their whole lives to see certain things as acceptable and others as taboo. These things take time to change. 

Now that people are feeling more comfortable identifying with non-traditional labels, I think the general consciousness is shifting. But you don’t need to be anything specific in order to embrace the unconventional.

I am a straight, 42-year-old woman and I consider myself to be feminine. I simply don’t shave, get plastic surgery, dye my hair, or wear makeup. It saves me time, effort, money, and frees me up to do more meaningful things with this short time I have here on Earth.

This “crunchiness” extends into other parts of my life as well. And it’s not just on principle. It’s to protect myself. Do you know what kind of poison is lurking in your self-care products, your food, your clothes, your household items? 

Things are not the way they used to be. Modern merchandise contains more unhealthy additives and contaminants than older versions of the same products. Food has become less nutritious over the past 70 years, and consumption of processed foods is at an all-time high. Harmful chemicals, dangerous dyes, and bioengineered ingredients have become the norm. 

Most commercial beauty products also contain toxic ingredients that can interfere with our hormones and are known to cause serious illnesses such as cancer. Don’t let the marketing of these products fool you into a false sense of security. They are not good for your body or your soul.

Companies have worked really hard and spent a lot of money to keep the truth hidden. For example, most people don’t stop to think about where their meat comes from.

Most fast-food restaurants, dine-in restaurants, and grocery stores sell meat that comes from factory farms. These animals suffer in deplorable conditions and die inhumane, unimaginable deaths. When you consume this meat, you also consume the suffering of that animal. 

Many commercial products also still conduct animal testing -- an antiquated, barbaric, unnecessary practice that again causes suffering and trauma on a massive scale, not only to the animals that are exploited, but also to you as the unwitting consumer of these products. 

Your skin is the largest organ of your body. When you apply commercial lotions, perfumes, deodorants, and makeup, you are introducing toxins to your body as a whole. Any one thing on its own is probably not a life-or-death big deal, but when you are constantly bombarded day in and day out with a multitude of untold poisons, your body can only do so much to fight them off and keep you healthy.

I am convinced that the reason why so many people are sick with cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure, anxiety, depression, etc. is due to the modern world. A lot of things that used to be “healthy” back in the day have now been reformulated to lower cost, lower quality versions that pose a threat to your immune system.

So, what can you do to protect yourself? 

Start reading labels. Research. Gravitate towards whole, organic food. Make your own stuff.  

Think for yourself –it’s not illegal yet.

It’s pretty easy to make your own skin care products. And it is the only way to be sure that you aren’t putting toxins in your body.

Did you know that the FDA does not regulate cosmetics? Also, makers of these commercial products are not required to disclose all the included ingredients. For example, to protect what are called trade secrets, companies are allowed to hide up to 200 harmful chemicals behind the term, “fragrance”. So, you don’t know exactly what you are putting on or in your body.

I make my own bath products, skin care, laundry detergent, and food with natural ingredients. And you can too. You don’t have to go crazy, even small changes-- one or two swaps can make a huge difference. 

Here are some of my favorite simple and natural recipes. I have included links to some of the products I used, which are on Amazon:

Simple & Healthy Recipes

Air Purifying Candles: Melted beeswax and coconut oil (about half and half), optional: essential oil.

No-Knead Crusty Artisan Bread: Mix 3 cups King Arthur bread flour, 1¼ tsp salt, and 1 packet rapid rise yeast. Add approximately 3 cups warm water (it will be sticky)—mix with wooden handle of spatula or silicone spatula and cover with saran wrap and a towel, let sit on top of oven heated to 250 for 2 hours. Dust fingers with a small amount of flour, scoop dough out of bowl, and plop onto parchment paper --don't worry about shape, it does not have to be perfect at all! You could also make 5-7 smaller rolls (this is my favorite way, honestly). Bake on parchment paper lined sheet tray at 425 for approximately 25 minutes. Let cool for at least half an hour before cutting.
*This also comes out great with 2 cups bread flour and 1 cup whole wheat, or even half bread flour and half whole wheat.
**I live at a high elevation, so this recipe may require more/less water and baking time depending on where you live

Face Oil: Mix castor oil, carrot seed oil, coconut mct oil, jojoba oil, rosehip oil, and frankincense oil.

Hair Oil: Mix castor oil, jojoba oil, argan oil, sweet almond oil, pumpkinseed oil, coconut mct oil, rosemary, peppermint, and lavender essential oil.

Body Butter: Melt mango butter and beeswax, add jojoba oil & mix.

Soap: Mix ½ cup distilled water, ¼ cup castile soap, 1 tbsp castor oil, 10 drops frankincense and 5 drops lavender essential oil.

Bath Soak: 1 cup Epsom salt, 1 cup dead sea salt, 1 cup pink Himalayan salt, 1 tbsp kaolin clay, 1 tbsp coconut milk powder, optional: dried flowers, essential oil.

Room Spray: Fill 1/3 of spray bottle with witch hazel, 30-50 drops essential oil, fill rest of bottle with distilled water.

Roll-on Perfume: 10-15 drops essential oil, fill rest of roller with sweet almond oil.

Morning tonic: Cut and smash handful of ginger root and a few pieces of turmeric, boil in 5 cups of water for 1 hour, strain and mix in 1 tsp of black pepper, 1-2 tbsp ceylon cinnamon (reheat to dissolve). Drink 1/2 - 1 cup in the morning, add juice of 1/2 lemon and 2 capfulls of apple cider vinegar.

Natural headache remedy: Fill large bowl with ice water and submerge face for a few seconds. Another option is to use an ice roller - I love this one!

Cleaning spray: Orange or lemon peels, white vinegar, distilled water.

Bamboo toilet paper: Did you know that regular toilet paper not only contributes to deforestation, but also contains PFAS, chlorine, bleach, and formaldehyde?

Thanks for reading! If you're interested in furthering your self-discovery journey, check out the instant download PDF of 70 self-discovery questions & 100 core values available in my Etsy shop:

*As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Gratitude-Colored Glasses

Are you familiar with the phrase “rose-colored glasses”? It’s used to describe a person who sees the world in a romanticized way, focusing only on the positive and failing to acknowledge any problems, perhaps leading to an unrealistically optimistic outlook on life.

On the flip side, sometimes when things aren’t going our way or we’re struggling with our mental health, we tend to look at things through a negative lens. We’re already expecting and accepting the worst. Even if something good were to happen, we might not even recognize it because our brains are trained to see the worst in any given scenario.

During these times especially, it is important to keep perspective. By looking at things through a lens of gratitude, we can more clearly see that while it may not be all good, it’s not all bad either. And there are always things to be grateful for. 

Putting on “gratitude-colored glasses” allows us to see the whole picture and to have a more positive outlook on life. We don’t ignore our problems; we simply allow gratitude to coexist with them.

We can identify our stressors and acknowledge our feelings while still giving thanks for our blessings. Rewiring the brain for positivity in this way makes us more resilient and better able to handle life’s difficulties with grace.

But it can be difficult to know where to start and exactly how to express gratitude in an effectual way. In this post, I will help you to:

-Identify Your Stressors,
-Name Your Emotions, and
-List Your Blessings

Only when you’re aware of the stressors in your life and the emotions that they stir up in you is it possible to heal with directed gratitude. It is my hope that these simple stress relief strategies will assist you in healing through gratitude and taking care of your mental health.

*All worksheets in this blog post + more are listed in my Kofi-shop.

Identify Your Stressors

Identifying the cause of your stress is the first step to managing it. When you know what your triggers are, you can avoid them or minimize their effects. Self-discovery and self-care go hand in hand.

Knowing your core values gives insight into why certain things stress you out. For example, if fitness is one of your core values, then missing workouts or allowing yourself to get out of shape could be causing you undue stress.

And knowing what helps you to combat the negative effects of those stressors gives you the power to protect your mental and physical health. For example, getting back into an exercise routine may help to alleviate that stress.   

Can you identify the causes of your stress? There are various sources of stress, but at the end of the day, we’re all human. So, no matter how different we might be, we still face common challenges in life.

Stress, “the silent killer”, is the root cause of countless physical and mental illnesses. In fact, the greater your stress load, the greater your chances of developing a stress-related illness.

The Social Readjustment Rating Scale (SSRS), also known as the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, is a self-assessment tool designed to help you determine the level of stress you are under. The higher your score, the more urgent it is for you to mitigate your stress levels in order to protect your mental and physical health. 

If you want to take the Stress Assessment, I’ve created a worksheet and it’s linked below along with a Stress Tracker Worksheet.

*It is important to note that this assessment does not account for individual stress tolerance as well as other variables and should not be relied upon as medical diagnosis or advice. 

Although there are countless specific causes of stress that vary from person to person, there are four main causes of stress for adults:

1.Death or illness/injury: This includes death of loved ones, debilitating injuries, chronic pain, illnesses (including those of loved ones, especially if you are a caretaker), and mental health issues.

2. Role change/new chapter in life: This includes school, retirement, getting married or divorced, having children, getting a new job, and moving.

3. Money/Work: This includes poverty, living paycheck to paycheck, debt, lack of sufficient income, unemployment, unsatisfaction with job/career, and lack of fulfillment when it comes to work.

4. Relationships: This includes interpersonal conflict, betrayal, break-ups, divorce, estrangement, and any sort of dysfunction in relationships.

Self-care is vital to managing stress. In addition to noticing what’s stressing you out, also notice what helps to calm you down. It may be necessary to set some healthy personal boundaries.

What works for one situation might not work in another, and techniques that you don’t think would work for you in theory may end up being the most effective in practice. Keep track of what works and what doesn’t so you can respond to stressors with your “go-to” activities.

Name Your Emotions

Maybe you’ve heard of the saying “name it to tame it”. It’s a simple stress relief technique that involves labeling your emotions as they arise. Naming your emotions helps to remind you that you are not your emotions, and your emotions are only temporary.

Keep in mind that even though some emotions may be more pleasant to experience than others, they are not inherently good or bad. Rather, all emotions are just feedback from our brain. We should be using that information to help ourselves, and not allow our emotions to override our rationality.

On a physiological level, when you name your emotion, you are engaging the left-brain (the side of the brain in charge of logic and language) and taming the right-brain (the side in charge of processing emotions).

Given the complex nature of feelings and emotions, it’s not always easy to identify the specific emotion you are feeling. For example, you may feel disgusted and angry with someone, but you may not be able to label that emotion as “contempt”. Simply do the best you can as you increase your emotional vocabulary.

There are six primary emotions from which all others flow: 1. Joy, 2. Sadness, 3. Fear, 4.  Anger, 5. Disgust, and 6. Surprise.

Here are some examples of more specific emotions falling under the categories of the first five primary emotions:

Joy

• Loving
• Thankful
• Peaceful
• Excited
• Amused
• Accepted
• Proud
• Liberated
• Confident
• Important
• Playful
• Inspired
• Curious
• Courageous
• Interested
• Amazed
• Optimistic
• Trusting
• Creative
• Intimate
• Valued
• Free

Sadness

• Hurt
• Guilty
• Ashamed
• Lonely
• Bored
• Tired
• Isolated
• Powerless
• Remorseful
• Abandoned
• Apathetic
• Vulnerable
• Fragile
• Grief-stricken
• Victimized
• Uninterested
• Overwhelmed

Fear

• Helpless
• Anxious
• Insecure
• Discouraged
• Rejected
• Persecuted
• Worried
• Inferior
• Excluded
• Inadequate
• Nervous
• Weak
• Confused
• Threatened
• Exposed

Anger

• Hurt
• Selfish
• Critical
• Jealous
• Irritated
• Threatened
• Frustrated
• Distant
• Suspicious
• Violated
• Hateful
• Bitter
• Betrayed
• Indignant
• Let down
• Offended
• Provoked

Disgust

• Disappointed
• Judgmental
• Revulsed
• Contemptuous
• Disapproving
• Ashamed
• Resentful
• Appalled
• Nauseated
• Embarrassed 

Here is the List of Emotions printable PDF:

Train Your Brain

As neuroscience teaches us, our brains are not set in stone. The way you see the world can change and grow throughout our entire life, thanks to neuroplasticity.  So, even if you have never engaged in gratitude practices before, you can still reap all the rewards of expressing gratitude regularly.

The more you do it, the more you will strengthen the neural connections that support an attitude of gratitude and rewire the ones that lead to negative thinking ruts. Meaning, you can literally change your brain and yourself.

In determining whether something is real or imagined, our brains look to how vividly we experienced something. But the brain encodes the vividness of both real and imagined stimuli in a similar way, thus making it difficult to tell the difference between reality and imagination (especially if you have a really good imagination). So, the more vividly you imagine something, the more it emphasizes the importance of that thing to your brain.

• Linger on Feelings of Gratitude

When it comes to healing through gratitude, think about experiences rather than just things you own. Zoom in on a positive experience that you are grateful for. Set 5 minutes aside to write about it. Relive the experience as you write about it. Feel as if you are in the moment again and visualize the events in great detail. Linger on your feelings of gratitude.

Blessings in disguise: Try doing this with negative experiences as well. Oftentimes, experiences that were not pleasant to go though in the moment still leave us with lessons for the future and opportunities to improve our character. We can feel gratitude for those lessons and opportunities.

• Practice Meditation

Meditation stills the mind. Instead of aimlessly jumping from thought to thought and being mindlessly reactive, we can regulate our thoughts and emotions. It helps us to be aware of our thoughts without judging them or allowing them to stick. This creates a sense of inner peace and a deeper connection to gratitude.

Meditation also has numerous health benefits, including lowered stress, better chronic pain management, increased concentration, elevated energy, improved sleep, decreased symptoms of anxiety and depression, lowered blood pressure, strengthened immune system function, improved memory, increased self-awareness, and enhanced mood.

In fact, a recent study at Georgetown found that a mindfulness-based stress reduction program was as effective as the use of an antidepressant in treating anxiety disorders.

By practicing meditation even for just 5 minutes a day, we can improve our mental health and our lives as a whole. You can incorporate mindfulness into your everyday life while doing everyday activities like breathing, eating, and showering. 

Try some types of meditation to see what works for you; there are so many, but to name a few: mindful mediation, guided meditation, transcendental meditation, walking meditation, vipassana meditation, metta/loving-kindness meditation, focused breathing, visualization meditation, mantra meditation, yoga meditation.

• Notice Your Negative Thoughts and Reframe Them Through the Lens of Gratitude

You are not your thoughts. Which means that whenever you have any thought, you can step to the side and look at it for what it is --- simply an idea or opinion produced by unconscious brain function.

So, when you have a negative thought, pause to acknowledge it, and then consciously reframe that thought through the filter of gratitude. For example, if you think, “I hate my life”, disrupt that negative thought and replace it with a grateful thought like, “Things aren’t perfect, but I love and appreciate many things about my life, including ____ (my pets, my freedom, my health, etc.)”.

Replace negative self-talk with gratitude. For example, if you think, “I’m a failure”, replace that thought with, “Failure is success in progress; I have learned valuable lessons from this trial.”  When Thomas Edison failed continuously at his attempts to create the lightbulb, he famously said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

Or for example if you think, “I’m so behind on this goal”, replace that thought with acknowledgement and gratitude for all the little wins you’ve had along the way that you may have overlooked.

In your healing through gratitude journey, watch out for cognitive distortions. Our brains tend to give more weight to negative experiences than positive ones due to an inherent negativity bias. We can overcome these cognitive distortions (all-or-nothing thinking, overgeneralization, catastrophizing, etc.) by keeping things in perspective and filtering our experiences through the lens of gratitude.

Why Gratitude Works (Scientifically Proven)

By making your gratitude practice a habit, you are literally rewiring your brain to focus on the positive. Researchers have found that expressing gratitude is also linked to a multitude of health benefits, including:

• improved sleep
• reduced depression and anxiety
• fewer aches and pains
• increased self-esteem
• enhanced empathy, and
• improved overall well-being

According to a recent research study, gratitude writing is not only beneficial for well-functioning people, but also for those struggling with mental health concerns.

In that study, participants were divided into three groups – one group wrote a letter of gratitude to someone each week, the second group wrote about their thoughts and feelings regarding negative experiences, and the third group did not participate in a writing activity. All three groups received counseling services.

Those in the gratitude writing group reported significantly better mental health in the weeks following the study, as compared to the other two groups.

Even those who didn’t actually send their letters to the intended recipient -only 23 percent did - experienced the benefits of expressing gratitude. So, you don’t have to actually thank someone personally in order to heal through gratitude; it’s enough to express your gratitude in a private journal.

Furthermore, even when a gratitude practice is brief, it has lasting effects on the brain. When the researchers in this study compared the brain activity of those who wrote gratitude letters to those who did not, they showed more activation in the medial prefrontal cortex even three months after the letter writing.

But writing a thank you letter isn’t the only way to experience the benefits of gratitude. Expressing gratitude in any way lowers stress hormones in the body and compels our brain to release dopamine and serotonin, the body’s “feel good” chemicals. It contributes to happiness and contentment with life no matter the external circumstances – a natural anti-depressant.

Count Your Many Blessings, Name Them One by One

When I was little, my mother used to often tell me to count my blessings. That advice has remained pertinent in my adult life; the simple act of counting my blessings has helped me get through some pretty stressful situations.

It’s not always easy to see the silver lining when you’re in the middle of a storm. Focusing on your blessings can help keep things in perspective when it seems like they’re spiraling out of control.

Gratitude is a powerful antidote to many ailments. Try directing your attention to all the blessings in your life and see if you don’t feel better about your situation.

Also, focusing on your blessings multiplies them; energy flows where attention goes. So, the more you feel and express gratitude for all your many blessings, the more blessings you will have to be grateful for.

It can be difficult to know exactly how to express your gratefulness other than just thinking about what you’re grateful for. So, here are some gratitude activities to provide you with some direction and an outlet for your feelings of gratitude.

• Gratitude Log:

Something I started doing for myself was keeping a log of all the little things for which I am grateful. It helps to write things down as soon as they happen, so you don’t forget. Try writing just one thing per day or whenever something happens. In this book, you can also include breakout pages dedicated to reliving experiences and lingering on gratitude like we talked about earlier in this post.

• Gratitude Activities:

These healing through gratitude activities will help train your brain to linger on the positive things in life, however small, and remind you to take nothing for granted.

Gratitude Journal Prompts:

When expressing gratitude, it can help to have some prompts. (Ex: I am grateful for this blessing in disguise: ______, I am grateful for this simple pleasure: _________, I am grateful for this test of character: ______, etc.)  You could spread these gratitude journal prompts out over time or write down one thing you are grateful for every day for 30 days in a row (30-day gratitude challenge!).

Here are the Gratitude Worksheets in printable PDF form:

Bible Verses for Gratitude (and All Kinds of Emotions)

“Count Your Blessings” is a beautiful hymn that reminds us to remain steadfast through life’s challenges, knowing that God is over all:

Verse 1: When upon life’s billows you are tempest-tossed, When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost, Count your many blessings, name them one by one, And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Chorus: Count your many blessings, name them one by one, Count your many blessings, see what God hath done, Count your blessings, name them one by one, Count your many blessings, see what God hath done.

Verse 2: Are you ever burdened with a load of care? Does the cross seem heavy you are called to bear? Count your many blessings, every doubt will fly, And you will keep singing as the days go by.

Verse 3: When you look at others with their lands and gold, Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold; Count your many blessings-money cannot buy Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.

Verse 4: So, amid the conflict whether great or small, Do not be discouraged, God is over all; Count your many blessings, angels will attend, Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.

Regardless of your religious beliefs, The Bible is a wellspring of inspirational quotes and encouragement. There are scriptures for just about every situation you could go through and every emotion that you feel; there are bible verses for encouragement, hard times, anxiety, healing, gratitude, etc.

I often look to The Bible for strength during times of hardship, but it’s important to pray in times of joy and abundance, not only in times of need. Think about your relationships with people – in healthy relationships, you’re there for each other through the ups and the downs, celebrating during the wins and consoling during the losses. It should be that way with God too (or whatever higher power you believe in).

This color-coded Bible Verse Jar is a fun activity to help you on your spiritual journey. Here’s how it works: color-coded bible verses for every emotion are placed inside of a jar (example: Joyful=yellow, Sad=blue, Angry=peach, Scared=pink, Thankful=green).

When you are feeling joyful, sad, angry, scared, or thankful, pick a piece of paper with the corresponding color and read that bible verse.

DIY Scripture Jar

The “Do It Yourself” (DIY) Bible Verse Jar is a fun and inexpensive craft you can do that does not take much time. Create your own scripture jar by printing out the bible verses on colored paper, cutting them into strips, folding them, and placing them inside a jar.

This bundle has everything (except paper) that you need to make your own bible verse jar for emotions: printable bible verses for jar, color code key, and jar label.

This is the paper I used for my Bible Verse Jar. You can buy it from Amazon, I've included the link below: 

DFY Scripture Jar

If you don't want to make this yourself, you can purchase it ready-made! The "Done for You" (DFY) Scripture Jar makes a thoughtful gift. And with 70 bible verses, it truly is the gift that keeps on giving!

Color-Coded Bible Verses for Emotions 

Here are the categories and bible verses – I’ve chosen to use the NIV translation for this project. If you’re doing this yourself, feel free to come up with different categories (it doesn’t have to be these emotions, or even emotions at all!) and/or bible verses.

1. Joyful (Lively Lemon) 2. Sad (Breezy Blue) 3. Angry (Punchy Peach) 4. Scared (Bubble Gum) 5. Thankful (Merry Mint) 6. Surprise Me! (White)

Joyful

• This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24
• But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you. Psalm 5:11
• But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23
• Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.1 Thessalonians 5:16-18       
• Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Philippians 4:4
• You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand. Psalm 16:11  
• Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.1 Peter 1:8-9
• I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. Ecclesiastes 3:12-13
• The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the Lord are radiant, giving light to the eyes. Psalm 19:8
• May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.  Romans 15:13                                                                 

Sad

• So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy. John 16:22
• Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. Romans 5:3-4
• Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12
• Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Matthew 5:4
• The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
• Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial, because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him. James 1:12
• The righteous person may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all. Psalm 34:19
• I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33
• For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 2 Corinthians 4:17
• The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:5

Angry

• But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. Matthew 5:44
• “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. Ephesians 4:26-27
• My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. James 1:19
• A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1
• Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult. Proverbs 12:16
• The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. Exodus 14:14
• But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Luke 6:27-28
• Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3:9
• For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 6:14
• So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12

Scared

• When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. Psalm 56:3
• The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deuteronomy 31:8
• Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall. Psalm 55:22
• The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. Psalm 18:2
• Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27
• Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7
• For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7
• Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23:4
• For we live by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7
• But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.” 1 Peter 3:14

Thankful

• Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
• If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. John 15:7
• I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13
• I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. Psalm 9:1
• And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:17
• Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Colossians 3:15
• Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Luke 6:38
• Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. Psalm 100:4
• All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. 2 Corinthians 4:15
• Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise--the fruit of lips that openly profess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased. Hebrews 13:15-16

Surprise Me!

• In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. John 14:2
• Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5
• Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain. 1 Corinthians 15:58
• Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. 1 Corinthians 16:13
• For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope. Romans 15:4
• Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. 1 Peter 3:3-4
• Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground. Psalm 143:10
• Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23
• Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. Proverbs 16:3
• Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well. 3 John 1:2
• The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever. 1 John 2:17
• Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8
• If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. James 1:5
• For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16
• And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. 1 John 4:16
• Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.” Mark 10:27
• Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9
• Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. Mark 11:24
• Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6
• So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12

I hope this blog post has helped you to heal through gratitude. Do you have a favorite gratitude practice or bible verse that I haven’t mentioned? Let me know in the comments!

Create Your Own Self-Care Plan
“Before anything else, preparation is the key to success.” – Alexander Graham Bell

Do you feel like self-care should be a priority, but you just don’t take time for yourself (or not enough time for yourself)?

If so, you need a self-care plan!

The best way to ensure that you practice self-care regularly is to have a plan.

A self-care plan is a preventative tool that will help you cope with life’s inevitable adversities.

Because you’re not exactly in the best position to be making calm, rational decisions once you’re already in the middle of a crisis. And self-care can easily fall by the wayside when life gets chaotic.

Having a plan in place ahead of time will help you to be resilient and maintain control over your health during stressful times.

Self-Care Worksheets- Printable 28-page PDF
Checklist, Assessment, Ideas & more

Self-Care is Crucial for Your Health

Self-care is crucial for all aspects of your health: physical, mental, and spiritual. That’s why it’s good to take a holistic approach when creating your self-care plan – one that will take all these aspects into account.

The relationship you have with yourself must be protected and nurtured --when you make self-care a habit, your body, mind, and soul will thank you!

You are the only person that will be with you for your entire life. And you know yourself better than anyone else.

So, it’s really up to you to decide what types of self-care will help you in what situations and what changes need to be made in order to ensure that you get the self-care that you need.

For example, if you are an introvert, HSP, and/or empath, you have to be especially protective of your mental health and make sure you don’t get drained from others’ energies, traumas, etc.

Why is it So Hard to Practice Self-Care?

We all know that self-care is important … so then, why is it so hard to practice?!

I can think of at least three reasons:

1. False Assumptions About Self-Care

Many people feel guilty about taking time for themselves and may even believe that self-care is selfish (which couldn’t be further from the truth!) False assumptions/beliefs about self-care also include:

-self-care is expensive
-it takes too much time
-self-care must be earned
-it’s only for women
-self-care is basically just pampering

Debunking these self-care myths is key to overcoming the self-care hurdle. The truth is:

-the best things in life are free and so are many types of self-care
-taking care of yourself doesn’t have to be time consuming – in fact, some forms of self-care only take a few minutes, and some don’t require any extra time at all!
-self-care is an inherent need we all have as human beings, not a reward to be earned
-self-care knows no gender, color, ethnicity, age, etc. – again, it is an inherent need we all have as human beings
-those who consistently practice self-care are more productive, less stressed, more confident, and more resilient

2. Lack of Self-Care Examples

Another reason why self-care is so hard to practice is that it can be confusing to understand what self-care actually is. Self-care is not just bubble baths and a skin care routine --- it also encompasses other things you do to enhance your physical, mental, and spiritual well-being.

Some examples of self-care ideas include:

-drinking enough water, eating healthy
-social media detox
-meditation/breathing exercises
-yoga/exercise
-limiting interaction with negative people
-spending time in nature
-taking an aromatherapy bath
-taking time for your hobbies
-expressing gratitude
-sleeping
-volunteering/fulfilling your purpose
-self-compassion
-setting boundaries/ saying “no”

*Here’s a list of 33 self-care ideas for physical self-care, mental self-care, and spiritual self-care.

3.Bad Habits/Lack of Good Habits

The third reason it’s so hard to practice self-care is bad habits -- or lack of good ones.

Throughout our journey, we develop coping mechanisms to deal with stress, loss, sorrow, anger, abandonment, betrayal, and all of life’s trials and tribulations.

But some of these coping mechanisms are not healthy. So, the first step to establishing a self-care routine is often replacing hurtful habits with healing habits.

For example, instead of drinking alcohol to relax, drink herbal tea. Cut out negative self-talk and repeat positive affirmations instead. When you’re angry, don’t react immediately– breathe, do yoga, and give yourself time to calm down.

As with establishing any new habit, the more consistent you are in your practice, the more “second nature” it will become.

That’s why you need a self-care plan that you will stick to through thick and thin.

Things That Can Interfere with Your Self-Care 
(but don’t let them!)

It’s essential to have self-care habits in place so you’ll be ready for whatever life throws at you.

How will you deal with an unexpected stressful event? Do you have measures in place to help you stay on track with your self-care?

You cannot afford to neglect yourself during difficult or busy times; in fact, it's during these times that self-care is the most important!

Some major life events that can interfere with your self-care routine include:

1. Getting Married/Planning a Wedding

Getting married is one of life’s most momentous, transformative occasions. 

Major life events like this, although happy and exciting, can also be stressful.

A 2020 study found that 72% of soon-to-be newlyweds use the terms “very” and “extremely” to describe wedding planning stress.

Certainly, there are many stressors associated with planning a wedding … just to name a few:

-Having a safe event in light of COVID-19
-Trying to stay within a budget
-Managing RSVP’s
-Choosing a menu
-Whittling down the guest list
-Coming up with contingency plans (what if it rains?!)
-Dealing with family members
-Organizing vendors
-Having to postpone

During this time, it is important to recognize what is in and what is out of your control.

And it is also important to remember that this is supposed to be a joyous time. So, pamper yourself in the time leading up to the big day!

Self-care for the bride-to-be is crucial – make time to just relax and be mindful. You deserve a slot on that busy schedule of yours.

Having a self-care plan that you stick to in the midst of all the wedding planning will help you to keep calm, stay healthy, and mindfully enjoy the process.

For those of you looking for the perfect stress relief gift for the bride-to-be, check out our spa box on Etsy:

Bride to Be Stress Relief Gift, Self-Care by 3D Success on Etsy

2. Coping with Loss/Grief

Those who are grieving the loss of a loved one often forget to take care of themselves.

Although everyone experiences and deals with loss differently, grief can disrupt major components of physical and mental health - sleep, appetite, hygiene, energy levels, etc.

And for some, the emotional toll of any type of loss (loss of a loved one, a job, a beloved pet, a relationship, a medical diagnosis) can become all-consuming.

While it’s natural to take the time you need to grieve in a way that’s healing for you, you must also be sure to continue practicing self-care during any time of loss or crisis.

These are the times when having a self-care plan (that you'll stick to!) will really benefit you. You won’t have to think about what to do when you’re in distress – you will already have a plan in place, an established routine that works for you. 

Coping with losing a loved one is never easy and it can be difficult to know how to support a friend/family member during this time.

If you’d like to express your condolences while encouraging them to practice self-care, consider these care packages or our sorry for your loss gift set on Etsy:

Sympathy Care Package, Self-Care by 3D Success on Etsy

3. Having a Baby

Many new moms let their self-care fall by the wayside after they give birth.

It seems impossible to find time for self-care with all the responsibilities that come with a new baby.

Some new mothers may even struggle with guilt when they attempt to take time for themselves.

However, this is where a self-care plan comes in handy!

During the postpartum period, it is especially critical to:

-support your body as it recovers and rebuilds, and
-support your mind as it adjusts and refocuses.

Keep in mind the old adage, “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” In order to take care of others, you must take care of yourself. And doing so allows you to be better at everything else you do.

Don’t wait until your cup is empty to practice self-care – make sure it stays filled.

Stick to your self-care plan!

Obviously, changes can be made to an existing self-care plan for many reasons including having a baby. The important thing is to regularly engage in the self-care habits that help you to stay happy and healthy.

Know a new mama who needs some pampering? Try our organic essential oil-based relaxation kit on Etsy:

Take Some Time for Yourself Care Package, Self-Care by 3D Success on Etsy

Creating Your Self-Care Plan

Now, it’s time to create your very own self-care plan!

This personalized plan will help you to maintain your overall health & well-being on an everyday basis as well as during high-stress situations.

So, if you’re committed to making self-care a priority, let’s get started.

Determine Your Current Stress Level

This can be a real eye-opener.

Often, we don’t even realize how stressed we really are or what is actually causing the stress.

So, the first step in creating a self-care plan is to assess your current stress level and identify your major stressors.

Once you’ve identified your stressors, you can determine how to lessen or eliminate them.

*There is a Stress Assessment and Quiz in the Freebie Library to help you with this.

Stress and anxiety manifests differently for everyone, but common warning signs of overwhelm/too much stress include:

-insomnia
-irritability
-fatigue
-isolating yourself
-feeling overwhelmed
-indecisiveness
-weakened immune system
-eye twitches
-labored breathing
-tight/sore muscles
-headaches
-lack of concentration
-low libido
-upset stomach
-memory problems
-mood swings
-angry outbursts

And stressors often have to do with:

-health
-finances
-relationships
-work
-housing/moving
-school
-traumatic events
-safety/security
-overextending ourselves
-mental health issues

How Do You Currently Deal with Those Stressors?

Now that you’ve identified your stressors, it’s time to reflect on how you are currently dealing with them.

Are you coping in a healthy way? Or do your coping mechanisms actually make things worse?

Examples of unhealthy coping mechanisms include:

-smoking cigarettes
-drinking alcohol/drug abuse
-sleeping too much
-overspending
-avoidance
-catastrophizing
-ruminating
-over/under eating
-overworking
-not prioritizing things that matter the most

And examples of healthy coping mechanisms include:

-exercising (releases endorphins and serotonin, natural stress-relievers)
-meditating
-practicing yoga
-breathing exercises
-aromatherapy with essential oils
-affirmations
-journaling
-expressing gratitude (Gratitude worksheets available in the Freebie Library)
-creating/hobbies
-doing a brain dump (Brain Dump worksheets available in the Freebie Library)
-setting boundaries/saying no
-social media detox
-spending time in nature
-treating yourself to a luxury spa box

Connect Those Stressors to the Self-Care Activities that Help You

First, consider if there are any stressors that you can:

-eliminate
-avoid or limit your exposure to, and/or
-reframe your mindset regarding

For example: toxic relationships, clutter, negative thoughts, complaining, unreasonable expectations, unhealthy diet, sedentary lifestyle, multitasking, procrastinating, etc.

Remaining unavoidable stressors must be connected to healthy coping mechanisms.

Notice what forms of self-care help you to remain calm during stressful situations. 

For example, you may find that it helps to mindfully color while drinking tea when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Or that it helps to do yoga when you’re angry. Or that you feel happier and more energized when you eat plenty of fruits and veggies. 

Whatever self-care activities work for you, make note of them.

Be Specific & Write it Down

Which brings us to the last tip I’d like to give you for creating your self-care plan...

As with any goal, your chances of success increase if you are specific and you write it down.

When you’re feeling stressed out, what will you do? What will you avoid?

Give yourself a visible reminder of your commitment to making self-care a priority. This could be in the form of your self-care plan, a quote, anything that reminds you to take care of yourself.

When practicing self-care, note what works in certain situations and what doesn’t. It may help to think of it in terms of stressors and their self-care antidotes.

For example, the Stressor might be an upcoming exam and the self-care antidote is a candlelit bath.

The Stressor might be an overpacked schedule and the self-care antidote is cancelling plans and enjoying a cozy night of TV at home by yourself.

Or the stressor might be that you’re feeling overwhelmed, and the self-care activities/antidotes are doing a brain dump and decluttering your physical environment.  

Keep track of your progress and make note of any changes you want to make. If one type of self-care activity didn’t work as well as another, that’s something to pay attention to!

Review your progress periodically to make sure your needs are being met and make any necessary adjustments to your self-care plan along the way.

Self-Care Plan Worksheets

Don't forget to download these self-care worksheets I made to help you create your self-care plan! You can get them in my Etsy shop -- available in printer-friendly black and white. 

Stress Tracker, Stressors & Self-Care Activities Diary

Self-Care Tracker, Monthly Goals

Healthy & Unhealthy Self-Care Habits,
Warning Signs of Too Much Stress

Self-Care Reminders – Quotes & Positive Affirmations,
Things I Am Grateful For

I hope this post helped you to create your own self-care plan. I wish you all the best in creating it and sticking to it!

Please share in the comments … what’s your “go-to” self-care activity?

Share this & help someone else!

*Related post: How to Create a Personal Development Plan (ultimate guide with examples of personal development goals)

* This post was originally published on November 25, 2019 and has been updated.

“Gratitude is the healthiest of all human emotions. The more you express gratitude for what you have, the more likely you will have even more to express gratitude for.” -Zig Ziglar

Thanksgiving is almost here (yay!), so it’s the perfect time to count our blessings.

No matter our station in life, we have many things to be grateful for.

And research shows that to express gratitude for what we have has many benefits, including overall enhancement of well-being...it's also one of the best self care ideas for stress relief (which we could all use this year!). 

Considering the extensive advantages, you may want to consider instituting a gratitude practice year-round!

But even when we are grateful, it's not always easy to know how to express that gratitude.

That's why I've put together some gratitude journal prompts and activities for you! Maybe you can give them a try with your family this Thanksgiving.

Show someone special that you're grateful for them by sending them a personalized care package this holiday season! 

Express Gratitude: Things to Be Grateful For

There are lots of things to be grateful for.

Sadly, our fast-paced, technology-driven lives can cause us to overlook some of the simpler (yet important) things.

But by focusing on these simple things, we can significantly increase our happiness and well-being.

Regularly expressing gratitude helps keep us to focus on the positive and keep things in perspective when we are overwhelmed and nearing burnout.

It cultivates a mindset that changes our entire outlook on life!

Gratitude Habits

A classic exercise called “three good things” helps us to bring all the things we should be grateful for into focus.  

Here’s how you do it:

Before going to bed, reflect upon your day and write down three good things that happened. Think about why those things happened and express gratitude for them.   

Gratitude journaling is another healthy habit that can have transformative results.

There are many ways to keep a gratitude journal. You could write down things you are grateful for upon waking in the morning or before going to bed at night.

Or you could write down something you are grateful for the moment it happens.

You could name as many small things as you can think of or you could select one (or a few) to express your gratitude for in a more in-depth way.

Or focus on certain topics like your relationships, your health, nature, etc.

Here are some gratitude journal prompts and activities that help me personally.

I hope they help you too! Maybe you can try doing some of them with your family over the Thanksgiving weekend.

Gratitude Journal Prompts

I am grateful for this:

Gratitude Activities

Gratitude Jar

Each day write down one thing you are grateful for on a piece of paper. Fold it and place it into the jar. Open the jar whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed.

Gratitude Rock

Find a rock you like (because of the color, texture, or pattern, or because it’s from a special place, etc.) Whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed, hold the rock and remember all the things you are grateful for. Take a moment to be mindful and focus on the positive.

Gratitude Walk

Go for a walk outside. Nature has an amazing ability to calm the nerves, lift the spirit, and clear the head. As you walk, look in awe at the natural beauty all around you. Think of the things you are grateful for that you typically take for granted such as the air that fills your lungs, the trees that give you shade, or the legs that allowed you to go on the walk in the first place.

Happy Thanksgiving!
 

 Over to you … what are you grateful for? Leave a comment!

Share this & help someone else!

Head over to the Freebie Library (a regularly updated collection of free downloadable content) to download your Gratitude Prompts and Exercises.

24 hours in a day.

4,732 things to do.

Only 1 you.

If you’re struggling with time management, you probably feel like you’re always busy, being pulled in a million different directions and there’s just not enough time to get everything done.

While there are indeed only 24 hours in the day, there are ways to make your day go smoother, calmer, and more efficient.

It all comes down to prioritization and organization.

Here’s how to prioritize tasks on your “to-do list” and get more done while still having time to relax.

* This post contains affiliate links. I am a Bluehost, Thrive Themes, ConvertKit & Tailwind affiliate, meaning that if you click on a qualifying  link and make a purchase, I may earn a commission. 

3D Success, LLC. is also a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com

Please read the Disclaimer for more info.

Where Does My Time Go?

The first order of business is to evaluate your current methods of time management.

Do you have any systems, habits, or routines in place to boost your productivity and keep yourself on track?

If you aren’t sure how you manage to be so busy and yet still not accomplish much, it’s a good idea to see exactly how much time you are spending on various tasks throughout the day.

One way to do this is by logging all your daily activities on a time tracker for a few day, or at least 24 hours.  

(If it’s going to social media or TV, it might be time for a digital detox!)

In order for this to work, you must be honest. No one has to see the tracker but you.

The time tracker will show you where all your time is going. When you look at your log, pay attention to:

-What things are taking your attention away from what’s most important to you?

-Which manual processes can be automated? Are there any that can be delegated for free/low cost?

-When are you most productive/energetic? Keep that in mind when making your schedule in the future and plan to do your most important or difficult tasks during those times whenever possible.

Make Things Easier and More Efficient for Yourself

As I mentioned earlier, the key to better time management is prioritization and organization.

They go hand in hand.

You must first decide what’s most important to you and then organize your schedule around that.

Remember that you only have so many hours in a day and you are only one person so be realistic with how much you can actually do while still leaving some flexibility in your schedule for self care and unforeseeable things that might pop up.

Everything can’t be a priority, so it’s up to you to evaluate and prioritize tasks and then say no and set boundaries.

Things will also go a lot smoother if you organize your physical space as well. Clutter not only takes up space in your home, it also takes up space in your mind!

So, be ruthless when decluttering – reduce or eliminate those distractions as much as possible. Remember that it takes about 20 minutes to refocus after being distracted from a task.

And once again, it comes down to what’s more important to you? A clutter-free space in which you can be productive – or the stuff?

This reminds me of something that the ladies from The Home Edit like to say – you either get the item or you get the space. Choose wisely.

How to Schedule Your Day for Productivity (and Relaxation)

A surefire way to kill your productivity is to overload your schedule.

Then, you won’t be able to do anything at all because you’re so burnt out. Or, the quality of your work will suffer to such a degree that you might as well not have done anything at all.

So, keep that in mind when planning your to-do’s for the day.

Prioritize tasks, pad your schedule and leave some space “blank” for personal time.

It is imperative to maintain flexibility to account for the realities of life. We all know that things don’t always go as planned so “expect the unexpected” – (any fellow Big Brother fans reading this? )

Setting boundaries is a crucial skill to have when it comes to time management. You have to say no to some things in order to say yes to others. So, once again, choose wisely.

Streamline your workflow and routines whenever possible to avoid decision fatigue.

Try to prioritize tasks that will save you time and energy in the long run. For example, instead of deciding what to make for dinner each day and then cooking it, why not plan ahead of time? Maybe even do some meal prep for the week - one less thing for you to worry about.

Is It Good to Multitask?

There are some times when it’s good to multitask. Like when you are washing dishes and being mindful at the same time. Or when you are doing yoga and meditation at the same time.

And then there are times when it is not good to multitask. Like when you are spending time with your family. Or when you are driving. (Put the phone down!)

Research actually shows that it hurts your brain to multitask and actually hurts productivity more than it helps.

A more efficient alternative is task batching. Simply group similar tasks together and complete them at the same time.

For example, I post an average of 20 pins a day on Pinterest as part of the marketing for my blog… but I don’t actually pin every day. Rather, I take a few hours out of one day to schedule my pins for the entire week using Tailwind, an automated social media scheduler.

Batching tasks together solves the problem of having to switch tasks (which leads to reduced efficiency and accuracy) and allows your brain to do what it does best – focus on one thing at a time.

Take Out Threats to Your Success

When it comes to time management, it’s not all about offensive tactics – there are some defensive ones to employ as well!

Threats to your success are everywhere – your phone, your computer, Netflix, junk food, negative people in your life … the list goes on and on.

Some of the main things that interfere with success include:

-Procrastination

There is often an underlying cause of procrastination. It’s not usually just because someone is lazy (although that’s definitely a real possibility).

One of the reasons you might be procrastinating is lack of clearly defined goal. When you don’t know what exactly you’re working towards, it’s hard to focus your efforts.

Have you thought about creating a personal development plan? It can help you get clear on what you want to do with your life and what needs to change in order to make that happen.

-Stress & Anxiety

Another underlying reason for procrastination is stress. When you’re stressed out, it’s hard to focus and be productive. If this is something you struggle with, check out these articles on building resilience and natural remedies for anxiety.

-Mindset/Perception

Some experts argue that overwhelm is state of mind, just like happiness. It’s not the sheer number of things you have going on that makes you overwhelmed. It’s how you view those things.

So, how do you think about your responsibilities/obligations?

Examine your internal dialogue. Make sure you are using positive language with yourself.

Try switching your mindset from “get to” instead of “have to”. For example, I get to work out instead of I have to work out.

-Lifestyle

Lifestyle factors influence just about everything from mental health to productivity.

If you’re not getting enough sleep and you’re not feeding yourself the right nutrients, your body and mind simply cannot perform well.

Make sure you are getting at least 7-8 hours of sleep a night. Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables. Limit your sugar and refined food intake. Exercise on most days.

You’ve heard it all before – but these are the absolute most important things you can do to improve your life as a whole, not just increase your productivity.

How Do I Prioritize Tasks on My To-Do List?

If you are overwhelmed, there is a good change you have a skewed sense of priorities.

What I mean by that is - you aren’t living in alignment with your true values. You aren’t focusing your efforts on what’s most important to you.

In order to get the most important tasks done, you must prioritize your goals and then strategically eliminate the lesser priority tasks.

Keep in mind that everything can’t be important. There can only be one top priority. If you are trying to do a million things, chances are the one thing that’s most important to you is not being given the attention it deserves.

So, ask yourself what you are missing out on by not prioritizing tasks that are most important to you and eliminating what’s not. The answer to that question will help you to understand the heavy costs of continuing your behavior.

To-Do Lists vs. Long Term Goals

Some people have one giant to-do list with everything on it.

And that’s why the list never gets done.

To-do lists should only include things that can be done now and completed in one step.

Aspirational “to-do’s” and projects that take multiple steps to complete should be saved for your brain dump.  (unfinished business creates stress – try writing things down to take a load off your mind).

However, the same principle applies when it comes to completing long term goals – what’s one thing you can do right now to move yourself closer to accomplishing your goal. What’s your next action step?

If it’s something that takes no more than 10 minutes, do it immediately.  

If it’s a multi-step goal that will take a while to complete, chunk it down into smaller goals until you have one thing that you can accomplish right away.

Or else, you may become so overwhelmed by the thought of the big goal that you never actually start to work towards it. Remember,

"Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway." - Earl Nightingale

Tackling Your Goals One Step at a Time

The Chunking Method

The formula for success when it comes to reaching your goals is to prioritize tasks and then tackle them one step at a time.

First, clearly define your goal – make sure it is SMART – Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-bound.

Then, make a list of all the steps it will take to accomplish your goal.

Keep breaking those steps down until you have a list of mini-goals.

Eventually, you will have one action step that will take no more than 10 minutes to complete. Do that now.

Keep moving through the list until you’ve completed all the mini goals and by the end, you will have reached your big goal!

This method works even if you are super busy. Just do the 10-minute action step and then at the same time the next day, do the next 10 minute action step, and so on and so forth.

Here are some Brain Dump Worksheets to help you prioritize tasks and goals- 

 Head over to the Freebie Library (a regularly updated collection of free downloadable self-help content) to download your Brain Dump Worksheets.

How to Stay Focused and Motivated

Motivation is not a perpetual state of being; it waxes and wanes. You have to work on staying motivated to reach your goals.

One way to stay focused and motivated is to write your goal down and keep it somewhere visible. Studies show that people who write their goals down are more likely to achieve them.

But while you should keep in mind what your ultimate goal is, only focus on what you have to do right now.

Make a prioritized list for yourself either the night before or first thing in the morning. Your list should contain no more than 5 or 6 items max, but 1-2 prioritized tasks that must get done.

Number your tasks in order of importance from #1 to #5 in order of importance. Only focus on your to-do list for that day and consciously block out future tasks until immediate ones have been completed.

These small wins will help keep you motivated over time. Also, keep track of your successes- write them down, even the smallest ones. How will you celebrate those wins? Create a reward system and stick to it.

Two Ways to Efficiently Tackle Your To-Do List

There are two efficient ways to go about tackling your to-do list – see what works best for you.

Either “eat the frog” (paid link) and do the biggest, most daunting task first. Or get some easy, smaller tasks out of the way to create momentum.

(This is similar to the strategies used for paying off debt. There is the avalanche method which involves paying off debts from highest to lowest interest rate regardless of the balance. And then there is the snowball method, which involves paying off the smallest balances first while paying the minimum on larger debts. It’s all psychology! Which one works best for you?)

It is also important to review and edit your lists once a week because things change. It doesn’t make sense to stick to something that has become unrealistic or no longer works for you.

How to Find Time for Yourself

Through all of this, it’s important to find time for yourself.

So, what are some things you like to do? How can you make time for them?

What obstacles are in your way? How can you get rid of them?

Remember to pad your schedule and leave yourself time for self care.

Absolutely no one will die because you took time for yourself throughout the day.

You do have time for a morning yoga routine, exercise, meditation, breathing, bathing, and any other healthy habits that are important to you.

So, instead of thinking of it in terms of “finding” time, think of it as “making” time. Make time for yourself. Factor self care into your schedule.

It’s just as important if not more than everything else on your list. And what’s more, you won’t be able to do everything else on your list if you don’t take care of yourself first!

Self Care is Essential for Everyone

(Yes, even you and I don’t care how busy you are. In fact, the more busy you are, the more essential it is!)

What do you usually do in terms of self-care?

If you don’t practice self care regularly, ask yourself why you don’t make time for yourself?

Do you feel like you’re not worth it? Or that someone else deserves it more than you? That you’re just not that important? Or do you think self care is selfish?

If so, I encourage you to work on changing those limiting beliefs and understand what self care is really all about.

There are ways to incorporate mindfulness and self care into your everyday routine. For example:

-Take 5 minutes to meditate or stretch in bed

-Do a shower/bath meditation

-Meditate while practicing yoga

-Go for a walk

-Be mindful while washing dishes or cleaning

-Practice mindful eating

-Follow a Self Care Sunday routine

I hope these time management tips helped you to prioritize tasks and get more of the important stuff done while still making time for yourself.

I’m curious – do you prefer the avalanche or snowball method when it comes to tackling your to-do list? Leave a comment!

Share this & help someone else!

I’ve been working from home for about three years now, but I know many of you have only just recently started your work from home lifestyle due to the current health crisis.

There are so many things to consider when working from home for the first time - like how you will arrange your desk and computer or what you should do to keep yourself safe and healthy throughout the day.

So, if you’ve been wondering how to set up your home office to successfully work from home, you are in the right place!

Here are some tips for work from home success.

* This post contains affiliate links. I am a Bluehost, Thrive Themes, ConvertKit & Tailwind affiliate, meaning that if you click on a qualifying  link and make a purchase, I may earn a commission. 

3D Success, LLC. is also a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com

Please read the Disclaimer for more info.

Setting Up Your Ergonomic Home Office Space

What Does Ergonomic Mean?

Also called human engineering, ergonomics is the science of fitting the work environment to the worker.

So, for example, if you are working at a computer all day, ergonomic considerations would include things like:

Ergonomics makes it easier and safer to use products and allows workers to perform tasks more efficiently.

It also reduces the risk of sustaining painful musculoskeletal injuries/disorders (MSDs) like tendonitis, carpal tunnel syndrome, back and neck pain, and other disorders involving muscles, tendons, ligaments, blood vessels, nerves, and joints.

So, if you are working from home, it is essential to ensure that your workspace is set up ergonomically so that you don’t develop painful, long-lasting MSDs.

Elements of an Ergonomic Workstation

Desk

If your office desk is too low, it can cause you to slouch over and develop back problems.

But if your desk is too high, it can lead to shoulder problems from holding your arms up in an unnatural position.

That’s why it’s so important to make sure that you have the proper size work desk.

Here’s a handy chart that tells you exactly how tall your office desk (both seated and standing) should be based on your height.

Considering that sitting all day cardiovascular disease, cancer, weight gain, and other harmful health effects, you may want to consider a standing desk.

There are also adjustable options that allow you to sit and stand intermittently throughout the day.

I purchased my desk from World Market (gift card), but there are plenty of good options on Amazon and other online retailers.

Chair

It’s also essential to have the right chair when working from home.

Some options to consider when choosing a home office chair include height/adjustable height and tilt, backrest, seat depth, armrests, and stability.

I purchased something similar to this gaming chair, (paid link) and while it was comfortable in the beginning, it ultimately did not last for as long as I would have liked.

Also, your feet should touch the floor. Which brings me to the next work from home office setup idea …

Footrest

If your desk or chair is too high and you aren’t in the market for getting a new one, try a footrest like this one. (paid link)

Back Pillow

Most office chairs do not have adequate back support.

Lumbar support is essential to preventing back injuries and promoting good posture.

If your chair does not have good lumbar support or you find yourself slouching over a lot, try getting a good back pillow. (paid link)

Computer

One of the most important elements of your work from home set up is your computer.

Your computer screen should be about arm’s length away and at eye level or slightly below.

If you’re having to look down at your screen, you will eventually develop neck problems so it’s important to adjust it to the proper height.

I purchased this monitor riser (paid link) and I love it, especially the side compartments for storage/organization!

Dual monitor risers (paid link) are also something to consider, especially if you are doing work that requires you to pull up multiple screens at once.

If you have a laptop, a riser with holes on the bottom like the one I have will also help keep your laptop cool.

External Mouse & Keyboard

If you do not have a desktop computer with a separate monitor, mouse, and ergonomic keyboard, (paid link) you have to be extra careful about your hand positioning.

I cannot overstate the importance of this – I’m currently suffering from lateral epicondylitis/tendonitis in my right arm and let me tell you, it is not fun!

First, I purchased a version of this ergonomic mouse (paid link) which was too big for my hand and just not comfortable, so I returned it and got this amazing mouse, (paid link) which I absolutely love! It’s just the right size and angle for my wrist.

Wrist rests

Your forearm and wrist should be in a straight line when using the keyboard and mouse; your wrist should not be angled upwards.

If you find it uncomfortable after using your computer for a while, you may want to consider getting a wrist rest for your work from home set up.

I have this wrist rest (paid link) as well as the longer version – I love that they are filled with comfort beads so they really conform to the shape of your arms and wrists (and they are way better than the ones I tried from Office Depot).

Document holder/organizer

Work from home musculoskeletal injuries typically occur due to awkward postures and repetitive motions.

So, when you’re working from home, reduce your range of motion when reaching for documents and office supplies.

Keep frequently-used items in reach, about an arm’s length away in front of you and on the sides of your computer/laptop.

There are many types and styles of document holders/organizers (paid link) to choose from for your home office set up.

 Check out the Freebie Library!
(a regularly updated collection of free downloadable self-help content)

Home Office Design

Unlike a corporate work space, it’s entirely up to you how to design your home office!

Take advantage of this opportunity to design your space specifically for you.

A lot depends on the type of work you do, the amount of space you have to work with, and your personality.

However, some universal elements you may want to consider including in your home office setup include:

Plants

Plants remove toxins from the air that are often produced by furniture, carpet, and ink.

Not only that but they are natural humidifiers and they also help to boost your mood.

So, it’s a great idea to include some plants in your setup.

Here are some excellent choices of plants for your home office:

Color

It is so important to choose a color that you love for your home office – after all, you will be spending a considerable amount of time there.

You may want a colorful, inspiring environment or you may opt for a more clean, non-distracting look.

Just know that color definitely has a psychological effect, so choose wisely.

Here’s a little guide to how certain colors can influence you and the work you do in your home office:

• Yellow: optimism, creativity
• Green: energy, revitalization
• Brown: grounding, focus
• White: minimalist, organized
• Blue: calm, concentration
• Red: strength, stimulation
• Black: introspective, protection
• Orange: creativity, energy
• Purple: imagination, wisdom
• Gray: peace, tranquility
• Pink: nurturing, soothing

Even if you choose to paint the walls a neutral color, that doesn’t mean your space has to be all one note.

You can add pops of color and interest with accent pieces like lamps, decorative storage, artwork, an accent wall, or fun additions like chalkboards/pin boards.

Home Office Feng Shui

The two basic principles of feng shui are energy and flow.

The purpose of feng shui is to enhance the energy in your environment and allow it to flow in such a way that creates harmony and basically, good vibes.

Therefore, plants, color, furniture, and artwork will all help to create such an atmosphere.

Some other elements of good feng shui include:

Organization

The foundation of a successful home office set up is a clean and clutter free space. 

Mess creates stress and will not be conducive to working from home.

Too many distractions for your senses will decrease your concentration and productivity. So, make sure that your home office is clean and organized.

Generally, the way I like to clean and organize any space – home office, closet, kitchen, refrigerator, drawers, etc. is the same:

• First, take everything out.
• Then, sort the items & get rid of what you don’t need, use, or anything that’s broken/incomplete, etc.
• Finally, clean the area and then put the remaining items back neatly.

Positioning

Your home office should ideally be as far away from the bedroom as possible and diagonally facing the door.

The direction your home office faces also influences the color choices and elements you should include.  

For example:

• North- water element, blue, green
• South- fire element, red, orange, yellow
• East/Southeast- wood element, brown, green
• West/Northwest- metal element, white, gray
• Southwest/Northeast- earth element, beige, tan, light yellow, light brown

Scent

A good scent helps to enhance your mood and the energy in the room.

While you can use candles, incense, or sprays to make your home office smell nice, I really like essential oils because they are the most natural and healthy.

Before vaporizing the essential oils, try clearing out the energy with some bundled sage.(paid link)

I purchased this set of essential oils and this humidifier (paid links)from Amazon and I love them both!

Light

It’s really important to have some natural light in your home office. I actually have my home office set up in my living area, the room with the most windows.

Whatever you do, make sure your home office is not so dark that you have trouble seeing. You can always add lamps if there is not enough light in the room.

*Bonus feng shui lighting tip - put lights on each side of the door to your home office.

Air

Air is another essential component of your home office set up.

Make sure you have good air quality and circulation to maximize the feng shui in your home office and to benefit your health.

I almost always have the windows in my home office open for fresh air, which helps your body and mind to function optimally.

But if that is not an option for you, consider purchasing a good quality air purifier (paid link) and going for walks outside.

Safe & Healthy Work from Home Tips

If you want to stay healthy while working from home, you have to set some ground rules for yourself.

It’s way too easy to get caught up in your work and forget self-care.

Here are my best tips for staying safe and healthy while working from home:

Maintain a schedule

Maintaining a schedule will help you stay on track while you’re working from home.

Of course, that schedule can be flexible, but having a general structure to your day facilitates productivity.

For example, I get up between 5:00 and 5:45 am every morning – you may get up earlier or later depending on what you have going on for the day.

Mind your posture

It’s easy to get lazy and slouch when you’re in the comfort of your own home.

So, make sure you’re maintaining good posture throughout the day.

The consequences of bad posture are pretty severe – back pain, digestive issues, circulation problems, MSD's, and fatigue to name a few.

If you’re looking for a way to improve your posture, I highly recommend yoga.

Eat healthy & drink lots of water

When you’re working from home, food and snacks are just a few feet away and it’s ok for you to eat at your desk any time you want (because, who’s watching, right?).

That’s why it’s super important to make sure you eat healthy.

Stock up on fruits, vegetables, and other healthy foods for the week. Maybe even plan and prepare your lunches ahead of time.

Also, pay attention to how much water you are drinking.

Dehydration can lead to dizziness, rapid heartbeat, fatigue, urinary and kidney problems, seizures, and loss of consciousness.

How much water you should drink each day depends on several factors, including how old you are and how much you weigh.

I drink about a gallon a day, but you may differ. Generally, health experts recommend drinking eight 8-ounce glasses of water a day.

Prevent eye strain

Give your poor eyes a break - they’re not made for staring at a computer screen for 8 hours a day.

If you don’t take a rest from looking at the screen, you may suffer from digital eye strain.

Here’s a great exercise to help protect your eyes – it’s called the 20-20-20 rule.

Every 20 minutes, stare at something 20 feet away for 20 seconds.

While doing this, it’s an opportune time to do some stretches and grab some water as well.

Also, make sure there is no glare on your computer screen. If there is, you can usually fix it by adjusting the brightness and contrast on your computer, placing lamps farther away from your monitor or reducing the amount of overhead light.

There are also anti-glare computer screens (paid link) that minimize the amount of light reflecting off your display – some even have a matte finish to reduce the shininess of the screen.

Protect your equipment

This is one of the most important factors of home office set up.

The last thing you want to happen is for you to suddenly lose all your hard work due to a power outage or a hacker!

Now that you are working from your personal computer at home, you need to ensure that it is safe and protected.

That’s why I recommend getting two essential things: 1- a heavy duty surge protector (paid link) and 2- anti-virus protection.

The type of protection you should get depends on how many devices you want to protect, how many features you want, and how much you are willing to spend.

I have had Avast anti-virus security (paid link) for the past couple years and I am really happy with it.

Take breaks

When you were going to work, you may have been required to take two 15-minute breaks and a half-hour or hour lunch at designated times.

But now that you are working from home, you may forget to take those breaks if you get caught up in your work and lose track of time.

So, make sure you are taking care of yourself while you’re working from home. A good rule of thumb is to get up and stretch or walk around every 20 minutes.

Just be mindful of how long you’ve been working/sitting and don’t overwork yourself or else you will become overwhelmed and burn out.

Hopefully, these home office set up tips helped - I wish you all the best & work from home success!

What's your favorite part about working from home? Leave a comment below.

Share this & help someone else!

Share this & help someone else!

A success mindset is key to achieving anything in life.

Your mindset is the foundation upon which everything else is built – your goals, actions, and ultimate outcomes all flow from the way you think.

That’s why it’s so important to develop and maintain an optimistic, confident mindset.

When you’re positive, life is happier and good things tend to flow your direction.

And although it does take some time and effort, you can achieve the success mindset you need to achieve your goals.

I’ve compiled a list of 30 simple activities you can do over the course of 30 days to enhance your outlook on yourself and your life.

Are you ready to participate in the 30-day success mindset challenge?

If so, let’s get started!

* This post contains affiliate links. I am a Bluehost, Thrive Themes, ConvertKit & Tailwind affiliate, meaning that if you click on a qualifying  link and make a purchase, I may earn a commission.  Please read the Disclaimer for more info.*

Head over to the Freebie Library 
to download your 30-Day Success Mindset Challenge!

Free 30-Day Success Mindset Challenge: 30 Activities in 30 Days

1. No complaining

It’s easy to get into the habit of complaining. “I’m tired”, “I don’t want to”, “I don’t like this”, etc.

Often, we don’t even realize how much complaining we actually do. And that’s unfortunate because it can really have a negative effect on our state of mind.

So, try to not complain for a whole day. Mindfully monitor what you say and make sure you are not voicing complaints.

*Bonus points if you shift your mental complaints to thoughts of gratitude (i.e. instead of “I hate working out or I have to work out”, think “I get to work out”.)

2. Transform 3 limiting beliefs

Do you have any limiting beliefs?

Chances are, you are harboring some negative beliefs about yourself, others, or the world in general that are holding you back.

But you have the power to transform those limiting beliefs to empowering ones.

For example, “I can’t” --> “I can’t yet”.

Identify 3 of your limiting beliefs and challenge yourself to transform them into empowering beliefs.

Check out this post for examples of some common limiting beliefs and how you can change them.

3. Repeat 3 positive affirmations

Ever heard the saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?”

Nothing could be further from the truth!

Words are powerful – both negative and positive.

Research shows that repeating self-affirmations can curb negative outcomes and improve education, health, and relationships.

The key to using affirmations for your success mindset is to state them in the positive and present tense.

So, for example a good self-affirmation would not be “I’m going to lose weight” but rather, “I love my body” or “I make healthy food choices and I am grateful for how my body works”.

Some other examples of positive affirmations include:

“I ... 

-love my life.”

-accomplish whatever I set my mind to.”

-am enough.”

-radiate confidence and optimism.”

4. Do a gratitude exercise

There are numerous benefits to expressing gratitude.

In today’s fast-paced, “bigger, better, more” society, it’s easy to lose sight of all the things we have to be grateful for.

But appreciating what we already have is essential to long-term happiness, confidence, and resilience.

To help adopt a success mindset, try doing a gratitude exercise like journaling. Write down what you are grateful for, such as:

• Act of kindness-
• Convenience-
• Display of mercy-
• Family member-
• Fortuitous event-
• Friend-
• Knowledge/lesson-
• Often overlooked blessing-
• Personality trait-
• Pleasant surprise-
• Simple thing-
• Skill/strength-
• Talent-
• Test of character-
• Teacher/Mentor-
• Unique experience-

Check out this article for more examples of gratitude journal prompts and exercises, which are also available for download in the Freebie Library. 

5. Meditate

There are so many science-backed benefits of meditation.

Not only does it naturally reduce stress & anxiety, enhance self-awareness, and improve self-esteem, it also helps us to maintain a success mindset.

Meditating for just 20 minutes a day will improve your mindset exponentially.

Try sitting still and allowing your thoughts to pass without judging them.

Simply acknowledge your negative thoughts objectively and let them pass, continuing to still your mind as much as you can.

Here’s a guided mindfulness meditation to help you:

6. Be mindful

Simply being mindful throughout your day can be dramatically transformative when it comes to maintaining a success mindset.

And the great thing is that you don’t need any special skills or an abundance of free time to do it.

You can be mindful while going about your daily routine.

Need some ideas on how to be more mindful? Here are 15 ways to incorporate mindfulness into your everyday life.

7. Do a social media detox

Social media can really harm your mental health and put a damper on your success mindset.

Studies have shown that despite its surface appearance of connectedness, social media can actually cause feelings of social isolation and depression.

Social media can be addictive and when you’re constantly online, it can lead to less overall life satisfaction – mainly because you’re not actually living your life.

Read this article for ideas on how to cut down on your social media usage & to get a free usage tracker.

8. Unfollow negative influences

While you’re at it, why not unfollow accounts/people that are having a negative effect on your mindset?

Comparison is the thief of joy.

When we compare ourselves to others, it can breed jealousy, low self-worth, and depression.

And the thing about social media is that we may not even be comparing ourselves to something that’s real.

Plenty of people only present what they want others to see online. And that creates a situation in which you’re comparing your real life to someone else’s fake highlight reel – not healthy!

So, go ahead and remove those negative influences from your feeds.

9. Journal

Journaling is one of the best ways to cultivate a success mindset.

It can help give you clarity and insight into challenging or confusing situations.

And it can help you work through the obstacles that are holding you back from success.

If you have trouble identifying or dealing with your feelings/emotions, journaling may help you to do so.

Set some time aside at the beginning or the end of your day to journal in whatever way helps you support your success mindset.

10. Perform an act of kindness

"For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned.” – Saint Francis of Assisi

In helping others, you help yourself.

To have a positive mindset, you have to be in a good place mentally – and performing acts of kindness helps you do that.

By helping others out of the goodness of our hearts, we improve our emotional well-being and open ourselves up to success.

Today, do something for someone else without expecting anything in return. Notice the healing effects it has on your soul and how it improves your mindset.

11. Challenge yourself

Fear of failure is perhaps the single biggest thing that holds people back from their true potential.

That fear stems from a fixed mindset.

Those with a fixed mindset believe that their abilities, skills, and intelligence are immutable whereas those with a growth mindset believe that they are able to improve with effort over time.

Having a growth mindset allows you to not place so much emphasis on the outcome or external praise and rather focus on the internal satisfaction that comes from the journey.

Today, challenge yourself to do something new - and rather than be scared of the possibility of failure, be excited about the opportunity to learn and grow.

12. List 3 of your unique talents/skills

Sometimes, it’s easier to notice other people’s good qualities than to recognize your own.

Especially if you are humble or you struggle with self-confidence, it can be difficult to pursue big goals/dreams.

Chances are, you are capable of much more than you think and you have way more going for you than you give yourself credit for.

Today, list 3 of your unique talents/skills. What do you excel at that most others do not?

If you have trouble with this exercise, try to think of yourself as your family or friends would – maybe even ask them what some of your best qualities are.

13. Don't judge others negatively

It’s simply not nice to go around judging others negatively – just think, would you want someone to do that to you?

Remember that it’s not really about the person whom you are judging, but rather it’s about you.

So, for example if you are insecure about your appearance, you may be more likely to judge others about theirs.

Those with a healthy success mindset do not feel the need to judge others negatively. Instead, they look for the good and give people the benefit of the doubt.

14. List 3 positive characteristics

List 3 positive characteristics about yourself.

Are you a kind and empathetic person?

Are you a loyal, trustworthy companion?

Do you have a good work ethic?

Everyone has positive characteristics that will help them to succeed in life.

Recognize these qualities in yourself and think about how they will facilitate the accomplishment of your goals.

15. Name something you’re proud of

What are you most proud of?

And what does that say about you?

Acknowledging our past accomplishments (and knowing what we are capable of) helps us to succeed in the future.

This is a great exercise especially if you tend to doubt your abilities or potential.

Download this as a PDF in the Freebie Library!

16. Learn from a role model

Having a role model to look up to isn’t just for kids.

As adults, role models can motivate us and show us examples of what’s possible.

Seeing and emulating their habits of success is extremely useful when it comes to self-improvement.

Who’s your role model?

If it’s someone you don’t personally know, research everything you can about them to see how they got to where they are today.

If it’s someone you do know personally, ask them questions. Gaining insight into their trials and tribulations, failures, and inspiration can help you form a powerful success mindset.

17. Learn from past failures

Every failure is a learning opportunity.

So, think about a time when things didn’t go as you desired.

What lesson did you learn from that and how can that benefit you in the future?

Today, reflect upon your “failures” and rather than ruminate on the negative aspects, focus on the valuable lessons they taught you.

18. Write down your definition of success

If you’ve been a reader of this blog for a while, then you know that I believe in having your own definition of success.

Society would have you believe that certain things make you successful like money, possessions, popularity, looks, etc.

But, those things are not fulfilling for everybody.

Each person has their own vision of happiness, success, and fulfillment.

It’s important to identify what that vision is for you so that you will know what you are working towards and when you have achieved it.

So today, write down your definition of success.

19. Get inspired 

Nothing puts you in a success mindset like motivational/ inspirational content.

So, watch a TED Talk, listen to a podcast, or read a book.

No one can stay motivated all the time – it waxes and wanes. But, in order to reach your goals, you need to make sure your motivation doesn’t disappear entirely.

Read this article for more tips on how to motivate yourself to chase your dreams.

20. Declutter your physical environment

It’s hard to maintain a positive mindset if your physical environment is cluttered.

Mess creates stress!

So, clean up your space. You need an environment that promotes success. Especially if you are working from home.

Depending on how big or messy your home is, you may want to tackle only one room at a time.

Today, clean and organize at least one room.

21. Do a brain dump

Your physical environment is not the only thing that needs regular clean-ups.

Your brain does as well!

One of the biggest causes of overwhelm is when we have too much on our minds.

Getting all that information out on paper really helps to reduce the stress that comes with day to day life.

Check out this post for instructions on how to do a brain dump and download your free brain dump worksheets from the Freebie Library.

22. Write down 1 goal

Research shows that writing down your goals makes you significantly more likely to actually achieve them.

So today, write down one goal that you have for yourself. Getting clarity on exactly what you want to achieve is the first step towards achieving it.

Stick to only one big goal. Even if you have several, focusing on only one at a time will help ensure that you don’t get overwhelmed and wind up dropping the ball or perpetually having lots of unfinished goals at once.

There are some goal setting worksheets in the Freebie Library to help you set SMART big goals and break them down into manageable mini-goals.

23. Find the silver lining

“Character is forged in the fires of adversity.”

Think of a negative event that happened to you and find the silver lining.

Usually, it’s not all bad and you can identify something beneficial about the situation.

Did it provide you with an opportunity to learn something?

Has it made you stronger, wiser, better in some way?

Did it pave the way for something better to come into your life?

Personally, what helps me get through bad times is remembering that even the most stressful, uncomfortable, or heartbreaking situations provide opportunities for personal/spiritual growth.

24. Identify an opportunity for improvement 

One of the best ways to increase your confidence and enhance your success mindset is to improve yourself.

Self-improvement comes in many forms – it can relate to your physical being, intelligence, habits, mindset, career, or whatever aspect of your life you want to improve.

Check out this post for guidance on how to create a personal development plan.

25. Get active

There are tons of mental health benefits to exercise.

Research has shown that it relieves stress and anxiety, boosts happiness, improves sleep and memory, increases self-esteem, and helps with overcoming trauma.

So today, get those endorphins going!

If you already exercise regularly, try something new and challenge yourself.

I recommend yoga and walking/hiking/running outside for their mood-boosting effects.

26. Listen to music

Music is uniquely powerful in its ability to affect our mood.

It can not only lift the spirits but music has also been shown to enhance athletic performance, promote a state of flow, alleviate stress and anxiety, and even accelerate healing.

It doesn’t have to be any particular type of music; simply listen to whatever motivates you.

27. Contact a supportive friend

Studies show that friends help us to stay healthy, perform better, and achieve more.

So, reach out to someone who is supportive of you and your life goals.

Just talking to that person and reminding yourself that there are people who believe in you can give you a much-needed mental boost.

28. Get at least 8 hours of sleep

Lack of adequate sleep affects your body and mind in several profound ways.

To name a few, being sleepy impairs memory and reaction time, makes you more likely to make poor decisions, and makes it more difficult to learn.

Additionally, it can put a damper on your mood, making you more cranky and negative – not good if you’re trying to maintain a success mindset!

So tonight, make sure you get a full 8-9 hours of sleep (and don’t be scrolling on your phone before bed! The blue light interferes with your circadian rhythm and inhibits your body’s production of melanin, the sleep hormone).

29. Name 3 good things that happened to you today

Today, write down 3 good things that happened to you.

It doesn’t have to be something huge like winning the lotto. It can be small things like having a moment of peace, sharing a moment of laughter, or enjoying a meal.

Being more mindful and appreciating the simple things in life leads to an improved mindset and a happier life.

This goes hand in hand with gratitude – taking time to savor your experiences and celebrate your accomplishments will help you to develop a positive, success mindset.

30. List 3 inspirational quotes

Quotes, like music, can evoke emotions within us and inspire us to take action.

Keeping certain quotes in mind can really go a long way towards maintaining a success mindset.

Put yourself in the right frame of mind today by either reminding yourself of some of your favorite quotes or learning some new ones.

Here are a few I love:

Inspirational Quotes

- “It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.” -J. K. Rowling, The Harry Potter Series

- “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”  – Albert Einstein

- “The meaning of things lies not in the things themselves, but in our attitude towards them.” - Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince

- “Men spend their lives in anticipations, in determining to be vastly happy at some period when they have time. But the present time has one advantage over every other – it is our own. Past opportunities are gone, future have not come. We may lay in a stock of pleasures, as we would lay in a stock of wine; but if we defer the tasting of them too long, we shall find that both are soured by age.”- Charles Caleb Colton

- “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”- Mark Twain

- “Don’t wait; the time will never be just right.” -Napoleon Hill

Check out this article for more inspirational quotes about life, love, and happiness.

Are you planning on participating in this 30 Day Success Mindset Challenge? Which activity are you most looking forward to? Tell me in the comments!

Share this & help someone else!